Our Journey Home ~ November 1, 2010

Our Journey Home

November 1, 2010

One year ago... This was a difficult day. Saying goodbye to the little house in North Pole. And literally moving out.

I remember sitting in the floor of the barren living room and crying. I felt like there was NO way we could finish packing and cleaning the house that day. There was too much to do. We had been working so hard for weeks and we were weary. The children were restless and packing was tedious. I had to stop constantly and nurse Havah and feed everybody else it seemed. The past weeks had been so stressful trying to get a trailer for the trip, making preparations and actually packing. Everything had to fit in specific amount of space we had taped off on the garage floor. We sold things. We gave away things. We hauled off things. So much had to be done. We had to take turns running errands.

We could only pack 10 minutes at a time because of the freezing temps. We paid extra to get the trailer early. We would gear up, open the garage and the trailer and work so quickly to put in as much as possible. The boys helped Chris and I. After about 10 minutes, we would close up the garage and open the door to the house and try to heat it back up as quickly as possible. The concern was that the pipes would freeze and burst – a serious problem for Alaskan homes. We did not have enough fuel to run the garage heat so we heated it with the wood stove in the house. We had a lovely supply of wood and had plans to stock up for the winter. When we decided for sure to move, we kept the wood stove stocked day and night. Very cozy.

The Koenigs had brought by supper the previous week and helped us. They returned with a trailer to help us haul off trash and donation items. They ended up purchasing our van but wanted us to use it until the following week – right before we left.

The vacuum cleaner broke on this day and we couldn’t finish cleaning the home for the next family.

While Chris and David were out taking off the trash for the last time, I filmed the other children walking around the property telling me about their special places. I wanted them to have closure. They had been thru so much with us as a family. I didn’t document much else that day with the camera.

Finally, we finished. We had to leave many boxes behind in the garage – they wouldn’t fit, even after our careful measuring. We put some boxes in the van to ship via USPS. I drove the van; Chris drove the truck and trailer. I wouldn’t drive the truck again for over a month. I was terrified at the thought of it!

We drove to the Ruccis for a late supper. I remember sobbing all the way to Mary Beth’s apartment. I loved our little home. Havah was born there. I would miss our little dirt road full of potholes. I would miss the wilderness and birches and snow and moose coming thru our yard. I would miss the cute little town of North Pole. And the bigger little town of Fairbanks. The frozen Chena River and the BBQs. The cold taking my breath away. And most of all, I would miss the deep friendship forged there in the last frontier. Such amazing people. So beloved to our family.

It felt so much like failure, leaving Alaska. I knew in my mind, this was our walk, but my heart was aching. 

After we had only been in Alaska for a few months, God told us we would be there 2 years or less. We were heartbroken. Here we had walked away from everything, relocated our family across the continent! We were just getting started!! We were slowly acclimating to the newness of everything and trying to figure out how to minister to the precious youth. We loved them from the beginning, and we were just making plans about what we felt God wanted us to teach them. 2 years or less!? No, we said, IF this is God, then we certainly were not going to make it happen. We would go on and do what we had planned to do. Circumstances prevented us from doing what we had planned, but we loved our church family until we had to move on.

We had stayed in North Pole to give God opportunity to continue to use us in that area even after our time at Jubilee was finished. After Havah’s birth, we all had a sense of closure and readiness for the next. We had planned to spend the winter in our little house planning a trip home in the spring. We had thought of many options, RVing home, flying home and shipping our stuff, driving and pulling a Uhaul, etc. Chris and I have a standing coffee date early each morning. We would sit on our couches in front of the fire and discuss our ideas.

However in late September, our hearts were turning toward home, especially with the new baby. In October, it became apparent that financially, we were not going to be able to stay. We tried EVERYTHING to stay in Alaska. We spent weeks outlining our options and researching the details one by one. Option One got crossed out. Then Option Two literally got crossed out. Option Three was Operation 48 Bound. We only had weeks to act on it and implement it. We kept double checking that Option One and Two stayed impossible. They did.

Interestingly enough, the children on their own started saying things about going back to the South. Two of them approached us separately in tears about wanting to go. They were happy but so lonely for home. As we started listing some things for sale on craigslist, Brennan privately prayed that we would get three nibbles that first evening if we were supposed to move back. By 9 o’clock that evening, not only did we have three nibbles, we had three bites! We had sold 3 things and they had come by to pick them up. Then he told us what he prayed. It was on!

In retrospect, we realized that if we had stayed until spring like we had planned, we would have stayed past 2 years. As God closed every door for us to stay until spring, we ended up being in Alaska less than 2 years. We were so thankful that God had spoken that to us. Even though we didn’t receive it at the time, it was a comfort to know that He Knew… all along.

It was madness to leave at the beginning of winter. The roads were already white. The temps fast approaching subzero. We were not just driving, but pulling a trailer and traveling with 7 children through the wilderness of Alaska and Canada. How much crazier could God’s plan be? Well… we were about to find out.